The phrase: “glass half-full”.

This phrase is used as a way of determining one’s basic outlook on life. If you sees a glass as half-full you may be thought of as being an optimist, ignoring the possibility that the glass may be half-full of ants, or bees or even worse, CLAMS.

The glass-half-empty kind of person supposedly always sees the dark side of any situation, the chance that things might go horribly wrong at any moment. But I always thought that all that empty space in the glass allows it to be filled with nice things like pearls or bacon fat. Oh wait not bacon fat, I meant to say money. Yes, money.

The amateur math guy in me wonders why the obsession with 1/2? There are other perfectly good fractions, actually LOTS and LOTS of them, yet we use 1/2 so as to keep the universe in balance, I guess.

And finally I remember what my physics professor told the class one day: “The glass is totally full … of *something*”

Hopefully not clams.